“In the journey of every great being, there’s a singular moment they finally surrender to their soul signature. They finally embrace who they are, the way they are.” —Panache Desai
I love the idea that we’re on a journey to our ‘soul signature’. I interpret that place as the true self, the ‘who’ I am supposed to be in this crazy life. I envy those of you who found a passion early. I’m still on my journey. As a kid, I spent hours sketching and enjoyed writing. I did not feel supported in creative pursuits as an adult. My loved ones chose good jobs with benefits; chancy, creative pursuits made them nervous. Looking back, I chose the safe route and put my passions in the ‘tomorrow’ pile.
I earned a bachelor’s degree in creative writing degree 18 years ago. I worked odd jobs attempting to use my degree. I finally started teaching English on the other side of the world. I planned to write, travel and work all over the world. I was derailed when my Dad became terminally ill. I came back home just in time to say goodbye. For the next few months, I recovered between my current city of Bellingham and my mom’s home on Vancouver Island.
I did not take that time to find my ‘soul signature’. Instead I was encouraged by my well-meaning mother to “just get a job, be a nurse or a secretary”. I’ve been nursing for over 15 years. I am not complaining. In many ways, it’s a great job. Nursing allows me to support myself, gives me flexibility and wonderful co-workers. Aside from that, I really like the act of nursing, it fulfills my need to help others.
Writing this entry left me with a little knot in my throat. Nursing has been a great vehicle for my life, it’s just not my destination. For years I’ve been looking for a way out of nursing and becoming more frustrated each year. I’ve stopped that. Instead, I decided to change the way I look at my job. I stopped blindly looking for an escape. I’m leaning into the time I have left at work. After years talking my way into the ‘golden handcuffs’, I finally remembered nothing lasts forever.
Especially not a job.
- Do what you love.
- Take some chances.
- Think of your current job as a vehicle, not a destination.
Featured photo credit to Donna Janigo